Once upon a time, lived Jessica in a land named Subang Jaya. Compared to many starving nations in Africa and war-torn countries like Lebanon, the land of Subang Jaya was rich and peaceful. Thus, Jessica enjoyed many luxuries like her poor old proton wira, 3-in-1 nescafe and most importantly, sanitary napkins.
Although not being able to spell the word glamorous,
(Yes. I admit I mis-spelled it. I'm horrible at spelling. So what)
I sang G L A M A R O S to Fergie's song.
Although not being able to spell the word - , Jessica still think of her own life as - .
However, there is one habit that Jessica still carry no matter where she goes,
her K I A M - S I A P ness.
Malaysians are like that. We bargain no matter what it is. Bargain, bargain, bargain.
Salesman : Auntie..very cheap already la 25.80
Auntie : Aiyah..25 only la...25 I buy from you...
Last week my family and I made a trip to Petaling Street. We walked up and down to look for Jo's perfect 'college sling bag'.
Salesman : Aiyah...lowest price 25 already auntie..no bluff one..
Mum : Can give cheaper le..23 sure can one...
My dad was constantly timing how long we took because as you would have known, parking ain't cheap in KL. In my mind, I was thinking if bargaining for another extra minute would bring the price 2bucks lower, we still have to pay the extra one minute over the 2hour limit spent for parking which is an extra 2 bucks. So, why bother?
Even though I'm so bloody kiam-siap with my money, I wouldn't mind paying a little more to the auntie selling t-shirts at the pasar malam. After all, how much money does the auntie make a day? To you, you might feel proud after buying the shirt 2ringgit cheaper which you are gonna spend in Starbucks anyway. But to this auntie, 2ringgit is one meal for her.
However, Jess makes certain exceptions.
Like this DVD seller in Summit.
After our short stint in Petaling Street, Jo and I went to summit to get some DVDs.
Actually, I only wanted 3 DVDs, but after seeing the sign buy 5 free 1. I feel I should get another 2 to get 1 free. Brain-damage shopaholic...
However, after dragging Jo through 3 DVD stores and going through hundreds of DVDs, I can only find 5 I want. Jo was already exhausted and squating outside the store like the samseng on watch for police. (Jo - Never go shopping with Jess.. ) So I asked Jo to talk to this fella from the shop.
Me : 5+1 DVD for 40bucks right? Ask him if he's willing to sell 5 for 32.
Jo : You cannot ask is it?!! Cis..I'm gonna complain to mum you abuse me..
Me : Ask le ask le...
Jo : *reluctantly* PSSSTTT...........
(yes. that was how she called for the fella)(she even did that kissing sound)
DVD man : Yes? Found your DVDs already?
He's been waiting. We have been in that shop for 20 minutes.
Jo : 5+1 DVDs for 40 right? Can sell 5 for 32? We don't want the free one.
DVD man : Aiyoh..cannot le boss... I will kena marah...
Jo : Nobody's looking also..fast fast sell to me can d lorr..
DVD man : Got camera there ar *points on top*
Jo : I cover the camera with my hand then you sell to me..
[Note : it was her exact words]
*laughs* Cannot le.. My boss will scold one.. You look around some more.. So many sure can find one you like one..
After ANOTHER 10 mins looking around, he finally caved in and said -
Miss.. How about 5 for 35?
Jo : *being absolute Malaysian* 32!
DVD man : 35 le..
Jo : 33!
DVD man : That's our best price le..
Me : Jo shaddap! Hold on. We think think first..
After ANOTHER 10mins, I think that the price is fine and I ask Jo to asked for the man again.
Jo : How to address him? Korr korr chai? His mouth damn smelly...
Me : Uncle or something like that le.. Cover your nose then..
Jo : Eh..eh.. *shouts* Uncle!
[note : he was 20 plus]
DVD uncle : HUH! Call me uncle?!?
Jo : Hehe....
Me : 5 for 35 right?
DVD uncle : *obviously tired of debating* Yes yes...
Jo : eh..34 le..
At last, we left the shop with 5 DVDs and 35bucks poorer. In my mind, I'm thinking the guy must be so relieved he got rid of us. Stay in the shop for a whole 40 minutes, bargain for so long, call him UNCLE, some more pinch her nose when he start opening his mouth.
Not only him, I guess you guys also tired after listening to my long bargaining story.
G L A M A R O S