Sunday, July 29, 2007

Loneliness of Studying

I've been taking time off to study, study, study, study, study, study, study...........

Studying is quite a lonely thing.

You sit there for hours.
Reading text discovered by people who are already dead.
Wondering why did they ever existed.
If they didnt, you wont be sitting here for hours.

Krebs cycle. Krantz anatomy. Malacca bacteria.

If Mr Krebs and Mr Krantz could have just met and have each other company and diminish both their loneliness by going to Malacca together for chicken rice and gula melaka everyday, these three things wouldnt happen.

Life can be unfair.
Mr Krebs and Mr Krantz never met.
They both dedicated their life to science.
Dedicated to a life of loneliness.

Which brought loneliness to the entire world when they have to study about their discoveries.

Keh Len once asked,
" Who invented the idea of school???? "
" The idea that we have to attend school 5 days a week. "
" Cant the school just be there and we come whenever we like??? "

Usually to beat the loneliness, I would run to my sis room and disturb her.
I would sit on her pillow.
Put her teddy bear under my armpit.
Then throw her teddy bear out the window for some fresh air.

Nowadays, Jo is not home anymore.
I'm even lonelier.

So I would run to my maid's room.
Jump on her bed.
And ask her to prepare snacks for me.

" Auntie saya mau hot dog! "
" Auntie saya mau roti bakar! "
" Auntie saya mau apple! "
" Auntie saya mau french fries! "

I do that on the average of 3 times a day.
If any of you seen any extra fat on me,

Soon my maid is leaving too because my mum said there's nothing for her to do at home.
So sad....

Who's gonna entertain me now?

Since Auntie is still here.
I better take advantage asking her to cook for me now.

Mr Krantz and Mr Krebs.
Feel free to join me.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

I Have An Apple

I have an apple,

and you have two,

you give me an apple,

and I have two.

I eat one apple,

and give one back to you,

I don't have any apple,

but you still have two.

Have any of you guys came across this nursery rhyme?

Well I know none of us has the privellege of growing up watching ' dora the explorer or blue's clues' but I'm sure you guys still know your nursery rhymes right?

I can still remember this one til' now.
Everytime I sing it Shiny will ask what's the point of this rhyme??!

I don't know either.


It's like when you only had one apple,
and you tried to create a delusion of having two by taking one from your friend,
just so you can eat yours without feeling guilty.

But at the end, you still have to return the apple to your friend.

If he was your true friend, he would have stop you from eating that apple in the first place.

What a bloody hypocrite.

Speaking of hypocrites.
I just got fitnah and backstabbed today.
I hate inserting unhappy things in my life memories but I really couldnt take it.

Innocent Me :
Oh. I feel like eating an apple, but I only have one.
If I eat this one, I will have none left.

Hypocrite Friend :
Don't worry Jess.
You can have mine.
I have two anyway.

Innocent Me :
Wow. You're such a great friend!

Hypocrite Friend :
nyek nyek nyek...........

Innocent Me * finish eating *

Hypocrite Friend :
Oh sorry. My other friend from Africa has never tasted apples before.
I'm afraid I have to be buruk siku to be generous.

Eminem once said " The best way to avoid being backstabbed is to not turn your back. "


enough said

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

I Love My Friends

Since today I dont have any 'ilham' for stories today.

I'll just do the simple thing every blogger does to satisfy it's readers.
Post a bunch of pictures and scrutinize them with you.

LeyYeem. That's the only picture of you in this entire post.
The last one in black.

I searched and searched but there wasn't any picture I could find with you looking vulnerable.

Same goes for Carol.
I hate people who takes bloody good pictures.
THUS I hate you both.

The rest of you here I love.

But I just thought of a story of LeyYeem aka Kayu.

There was one day, Carol and I were racing down the streets of Subang Jaya.

LeyYeem & Tracey was with Carol.
Shiny & Loi was with me.

They raced past us once.
All of them turned and wave and make funny faces at us.


We raced past them,

Shiny & Loi :

" They show us finger! Five fingers!!!

(this is how my stupid friends describe waving)

Faster! Show them the middle finger!! "

And they were shocked THUS hit some trees nearby.

Recently when we discuss about the incident...

Shiny : blah blah blah blah blah.....

Me : Ya! And LeyYeem was so shocked we flashed the third finger!

LeyYeem :

*looking puzzled*

third finger...



If you still dont get the joke, nevermind. At least I satisfied myself by embarrassing LeyYeem aka Kayu in my blog.

I'm not so sure of the actual reason we name her Kayu but I know once when we were chasing the rapid KL bus for tuition,

she ran and slam her face right into a signboard.

That is Shiny, Frizzy and JessicaLoke.

Shiny was named by many teachers who couldnt pronounce her chinese name.

And she'll show this ugly face everytime she gets irritated with me.
Which is like every single day.
THUS she became Fugly Shiny.

Whereas Frizzy aka Tracey aka half-brain....
story too long to be told here..

But it has something to do with her hair cuz approximately after 6months she straighten her hair each time, the hair will curl back THUS she will become frizzy.

Even her moustache is frizzy.

This is ET baby.
Check out the size of that forehead!

It didn't stop growing, still growing right now as I speak.
One day this baby had some un-identified growth near her eyes.
Something like this....

Me : Hey Loi! You okay? Studying too much?
Loi : I'm okaylah.
Me : You sure? Watched porn last night is it?
Shiny : No la! She looked into the mirror!
I think after Loi sees this, I will be absent for a couple of days.
She sits right beside me.
Loi. You know I do love you right?
We have the same name!
That has to mean something!
Oh which reminds me another story...
I sat behind her once during the 200people PA tuition..
So being the annoying person I was I kept pulling her hair from behind.
Then Loi got angry.
Loi :
*trying to look as angry as possible*
Jessica Loke. One more time you pull my hair I'm gonna shout your name out loud in the middle of the class.
Me : But.. It's your name too!
I'm sorry Loi.
Please don't headbutt me with your big forehead (7.5cm) when I come back to school.

19th July - Tracey Lim's Birthday!

I know we tease you alot and call you half brain and all,
but we only did so so that you could have a seat in the crowded LRT at the "special allocated place".

Actually there's still HsinSian, Melissa, MingSze, FoongPing, DharDhar, KehLen, ShenNi, Suki, Ting, Chin, Horny...............many many more..............

But "masa tidak mengizinkan"

So until next time,

Love Love Jessica.


Saturday, July 14, 2007

Check Jess Out!

Someone has been stalking me.

I asked the person to.

Look how cool is Loke!!
jess you're damn lame...

This couple of days I've been craving for all the attention in the world.

I wanna look, feel prettier.

I think it's only normal right?

Everybody craves for attention once in a while.
Everybody wanna feel pretty some point in their lives.

Should i straighten my hair?
Should i get some fake eye-lashes?
Should i get contacts?
Should i diet?
And throw in some fake boobs so i will still actually have one?
or two

I mean I'm 18 right?
I have the right to look good and feel the best!

Money and time shouldn't be a restriction!

Majlis Perpisahan Tingkatan 5 & 6 (MPT5) is coming.

Who needs a date?

I promise I will dress to impress!

But frankly I don't enjoy events like this.

You pay a good deal of money for -
1. food your maid can prepare better.
2. mediocre performance.
3. having to dress to impress your date.
4. having to dress to impress everybody.
5. having to compare how good (expensive) you can dress.

So, yes. I hate to dress up.

Even if I may actually look good in the dress,
I will keep tugging at some part of my dress,
feeling as awkward and uncomfortable as ever.

Confidence is the key to.....whatsoever right?
blah.. As if anyone would remember what Oprah says at moments like -
Look at X 500 bucks dress!
mine is 15 from pasar malam...
*makes sure the price tag is off*
Have you seen X, she looks drop dead gorgeous!
= ( I look pretty also.......
X look so different with her 200 bucks make-up!
='( my mummy make up for me very nice also....

During events like this I think we need to be reminded that no one is actually looking at us, everybody is so busy fussing over how they look nobody will actually take their mind of themselves.

And yes, I'm jealous of guys who feel comfortable no matter how they look.

ChietChun picture is next.

Even he got bigger boobs than me.


Guys are dumb.

Cis bedebah...

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Joy or Happiness or Perbalahan ?

Today Pn C asked me,

" What's the different between Joy and Happiness? "

I didn't know how to answer.

Well, technically, happiness happens from external factors like when you get A++++ for an exam or when I see Shiny roll down the stairs. Joy however, happens by internal factors, " like when you find peace within yourself " as quoted by Pn C.

I need to find peace within myself???
Stop being so self-centred JessLoke...

Maybe I really do need to find peace...

Although it's really embarrassing and most of you guys reading this already know this but I'm still gonna enter it to the biography of JessicaLoke.

I'm really nervous talking when everybody is listening.
I always fumble somewhere through my speech on stage.

I keep telling myself to go slow, go slow, but my mouth wouldnt listen.

What to do??

Thus, this cause me a HUGE mistake last Monday while I was reading misi sekolah on stage.

When I finish declaring our beloved ikrar pelajar, I exhale and let out my sweat.
I thought to come's the easier part...

So I read -

Mempunyai 'crictical inquiry'
yes, yes, we need crictical inquiry

blah blah.. mempunyai 'self-esteem' yang tinggi
one stupid boy near the stage keeps laughing..
wait til' I get him later...


untuk menyesuaikan diri dengan PERBALAHAN dunia..


Later, no matter how much I avoided, I still bumped into Pn Ch...

Pn Ch : JESSICA! You cannot pronounce PERUBAHAN IS IT??!!

Me : Sorry teacher, sorry teacher.

Pn T : Yalah...PERBALAHAN is DISASTROUS you know!

Me : Yes, yes I know teacher. Sorry, sorry. *quickly run upstairs*

Then back in class when I just enter...
the blackboard got BIG BIG


So, I tried to explain to the class...

Me :
Class listen! You will think that I'm right someday...

The war is at world!


Forget I ever spoke.

*sits down quietly and cry and be depressed*

Shiny : Eh, maybe someday they will change the misi sekolah you know!

Carol : Ya! Because the WAR IS AT WORLD!

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Jessica has to Study!

Jessica has another 55 days to STPM trial.

Jessica still has :

14 chapters of Physical Chemistry
15 chapters of Organic Chemistry
5 chapters of Inorganic Chemistry

A total of 34 chapters of Chemistry to study

15 chapters of Volume 1 Biology
16 chapters of Volume 2 Biology

A total of 31 chapters of Biology to devour

16 hardcore chapters of Math to..........i ran out of terms

ALOT of general studies to know, about 10000 topics, being a responsible Malaysian -

Malaysia Boleh... says devour means to eat up greedily or to destroy as if by eating~

I want to devour Pn D with my freakin PEKA rat Betty as dessert.

So it's a grand total of 81 +++ another 10000 chapters to finish in this 55 days.

So don't message asking me to go out.

- I wouldn't ever reply anyway..

Don't talk to me about transformers.

- Hmph... I don't like robots anyway...

Don't ask me to celebrate MERDEKA !!!!

Don't tell me its Visit Malaysia 2007 !!!!!!!!!!

JUST LEAVE ME ALONE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today I skipped school to study.

I woke up 7am.

Ate breakfast and sat at the dining table motionless til' 8am.

Typed my notes and review them til' 9am.

Then at 9am, I told myself I have a well-deserved break right?

I started playing coffee tycoon, I would play any lame game because people would do anything to procrastinate, even thinking that de-hairing themselves is a more important task.

So I click on the game, I exhale, I keep clicking to release my frustration while making sure I sell lots of coffee while contemplating my chances of succeeding as a kopitiam tycoon.

If I try my best to ignore the clock while playing, I wouldn't know how long it has been thus I can't be blame for playing games for a long time and should not feel guilty right?

Then at 9.05am......

How to describe the sound when the computer shut down?


No electricity.

Then my maid yelled -

" Jessica! Tak ada elektrik hari ini.. Surat ada kata dari 9pagi hingga 5petang tak de elektrik.. "

* WTF *

God wants me to study.
He hear my thoughts.