Friday, August 10, 2007

50th Post! 50th Merdeka!

This is my 50th post!

So in conjunction with Merdeka month,
I have to express my love for my country - Malaysia.

Also in conjunction with my 50th post,
I will let you guys in on a secret.

And it's not the secret that Melissa is actually very fair.
Neither it is the fact that Melissa seem dark but her boobs is very fair.


3.21am 20/12/1988

Out came JessLoke to greet Malaysia!

[note : Yes. Go programme 20/12 into your phone RIGHT NOW.]

Malaysia was very nice to Jess.
She gave Jess peace within the nation, politics stability
and most of all,
Hope for tomorrow.

Plus, being able to have such tasty and cheap breakfast
- Roti Canai - it was 60 cents in the good ol' days.

So anyway, Malaysia gave Jess a good education although I couldnt differentiate between - world, country and planet.

I've once believed that Malaysia is a planet on it's own.
I was pretty dumb back then.

I thought that babies just burst out of people's stomach / belly button.
But that's not the worse part.

Dumb Me : Which part of the body does the period leaks?

Pad Company Woman : The part where babies come out.

What a 'informative' Pad Company Education Women...

Babies come out from the belly right......?

Period blood will come out from my belly?????

Oh no.....

- after the joke went public -

Smart Me : Crap. I think I got period now.

Carol : Just use a cork and screw it in your belly button!

Later on when I spilled coffee on my shirt strategically on the stomach area...

Carol : Loke! You having period now! Look at the brown stain!


The point is Malaysia has groomed me well.
From a dumb dumb last time, I've became an above average intellectual person now.

I now know that we all live on planet earth and the glaciers are melting and we're all gonna die of global warming.
I also now know that period comes out from your vajayjay and why some sanitary pads have 'wings'.

I'm trying my best to express my love for our Malaysia without dwelling into stereotypes about how we are so multi-coloured and harmonious or the fact that our clocks are bloody useless because we keep malaysia timing like the BLOODY great public transportation system in Malaysia and I will feel like killing myself if I keep talking about how punctual rapid KL or MAS is.


Point is, our country has came a great length since 1957 when Mr Tunku Abdul Rahman yelled 'Merdeka' 3 times to declare the independence of our Malaysia.

*edit - TAR SHOUTED MERDEKA 7 TIMES !!!!!!!!!*
* I was only a victim of advertisements on television, on ads they will only shout 3 TIMES! *

Whether we like it or not, Malaysia is part of our being no matter how far we may go later in life.

We can never forget
our first taste of maggie mee,
our first taste of roti canai roti telur roti planta roti so many,
our first taste of wearing sari/baju kebaya,
our first taste of saying 'LAH'

We do owed it to our nation for who we are today.

Do the least by saying Thank You,
and please don't steal my Malaysia flag when I put one on my car.

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