Sunday, August 24, 2008

Confession of My Costly Addiction

By now if you still don't know what it is and call yourself Jess' friend you better go bang your head 10 times and jump down from KL tower or the Burj Al Arab (more glamorous not?)

Okay.
This is my confession.

Dearest people, I love you guys so much but I know I've ffk many of you many times during the past 16days.

Actually I always ffk regardless of Olympics right?
Heeee....... I promise it's for a good cause!

----> Jess Loke in London 2012!

Sorry about the supposedly lunch, dinner, yam char, short trips, photos, messages not replied, phone calls not answered (I don't even know where I terbuang my phone actually).

PeiTing I acknowledge it's not easy planning and I really wanna say sorry for missing things yet again. I told you I was available 3 pm Saturday but then right........last minute.......... I found out that the final handball match was 3.45 pm so THAT was the 'important stuff which time can't be changed'.

Jess Loke sincerely apologize.

However the times when I have to pick up cousin from airport, mum from bus station, Jo to bus station, Jo from ktm, those are all true lar.
I also don't know why people want me to pick them up knowing my 'awesome' driving skills.

Sammy I really sorry for not calling, only saw Ken's message later. Hope all is great over at the Big Apple!
Please remember to get me Chuck Bass' scarf!

The worst of this addiction was Saturday during a chess competition.

Omigosh yes Jess playing chess! It shall be in London 2012 as a world-class sport.

Fact is I think God was trying to play some trick on me on that day. I joined this competition because my church mate wanted to join and I can't let her down or Jesus will be sad.

Plus it's call 'Lightning Chess' right? How long can it take?
The competition starts at 1pm and honestly, seriously honestly, I'm not trying to be humble or anything but I admit I really am horrible in chess.

Let's see, I've never won a game against my computer even when the level is set EASY.
Computers are liars dammit, EASY my foot!

I've never won a game against anyone online either.
I always tried to chat saying "Hi! How are you I'm from Malaysia" but they NEVER reply and after a couple more steps they checkmate me and I say "Nice game! (:" which they NEVER reply either and just left the game with the mad asian girl.

Last but not least, I've never won a game against my maid either.
I tell you she MUST have an IQ of 200 something.
I can't tell you how come she's a maid though.

So Saturday I went to the competition arriving with the usual Malaysian fashion of 1.05pm and my competitor was even later than me.
In my mind I was only thinking "Yes, yes! Give me that nerd with the thick glasses and beat me in 10minutes so I can finish early and even drop by Giant to buy popcorn and sweet diabetic drinks before the event begins!" *smiles gleefully*

And then the unexpected happened - I won that quite cute looking guy whom I feel sorry for because I really wanted him to win.

"Congratulations Jessica! Now wait here for the second round."

"WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY!"
"Nevermind now only 1.45pm, if I lose the next match still plenty of time right? I can still drop by Petronas to get twisties"

And THEN, I won the second match.

"Congratulations Jessica! Wow Jess I didn't know you are so pro in chess!"

"Oh thank you I didn't know either"

"It's okay, it's okay Jessica it's only 2.40pm now, if you make the next one quick you still can microwave yourself some fatty junk food before the match begins!"

The next round - "Lose dammit! Jessica Loke if you don't lose now you're gonna miss the match! How can you do this to the great Olympics which you are going to debut in 2012??!"

"Checkmate" "OMIGOSH I CAN'T BELIEVE IT I LOST I LOST I LOST AND THAT FELLA DOESN'T EVEN HAVE HIS QUEEN LEFT AND CHECKMATE ME WITH A HORSE wtf wtf wtf I could've won!!!"


"It's okay, it's okay Jessica, now you can zoom home and watch the match and if your country loses then you can cry later." *smiles gleefully again and picks up bag and starts to run*

"Jessica! Don't go yet! You have another match to determine the third place!"

JESUS! IS CHESS MY CALLING??
AM I GONNA REPRESENT MALAYSIA FOR CHESS IN THE FUTURE??!


Long story short, it was 4.15pm and I lost the third placing to another geek with thick glasses.
I got home 4.45pm going 130km/hour and had no idea why the garden pipe is bursting like a fountain and mummy is not home!


4.47pm - after 2 minutes of attempting to shut the water I give up and watch the remaining 10minutes of the game on television drinking filtered tap water.


"at least my team won wtf"

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